owing us the way even if we weren’t shown how to do it growing up you always show us the way God we just praise you and celebrate you you are so good father please help us to continue in Worship in the service this morning as we celebrate fathers and graduates thank you God you are faithful and you will continue to lead us in Jesus name we pray amen you may have a hmm well we have something real special for everyone this morning before the kids leave

and that is one that this morning is promotion Sunday so we’re promoting all the grades up one grade but even more specific than that is we want to honor graduates this morning and we have three fifth graders that are moving into sixth grade two eighth graders that are moving into ninth grade and five seniors that are graduating and I think you saw there’s an insert in your bulletin for all those seniors but what we would like to do this morning is be able to just honor

them be able to pray over them be able to just encourage them in this amazing step that they’re taking and so I just want to just ask if you’re willing you don’t have to graduates but if any of our graduates would be willing to come up here and anyone going from fifth grade to sixth grade eighth grade to ninth grade or seniors if you would be willing to come up on stage we would just love to pray over you so that’s what we’re gonna do right

now thank you all right come on up so it says in second Timothy 4 7 Paul says I have fought the good fight I have finished the race I have kept the faith and I know he was talking in terms of his life and what what he had done to live for God throughout his life but in these years that you’ve been whether it’s in middle school or elementary school or High School you truly have fought the good fight you have finished the race you have

kept the faith and that is an incredible thing and I just want to encourage you to continue to live that out graduates to continue to live for God and keep the faith as you keep going so that hopefully one day when you get to being old in yours and you’re like Paul when he’s writing second Timothy you can say the same thing I have fought the good fight I finished the race I’ve kept the faith and now there’s in store for me a crown of righteousness

you’re going to be in heaven with him one day but we just want to honor you this morning we want to pray over you and just want to say Lord just continue to to move in your guys’s lives in this next season so let me pray over you and let’s just let’s present you to the Lord in this time so Lord we we thank you for each and every graduate who’s up on stage this morning and those that are not and we just ask that you

would continue to to walk with them that you would continue to show them how to grow in their relationship with you and that you would continue to show them how to be successful as they some of them go off to college and just trying to figure out what’s next for them our graduates that you would just lead them and guide them in your truth Lord and that you would show them what you have in store for them we just ask for a blessing upon them that

your favor would be upon them and that you would bear much fruit through their lives as they continue to seek you first in your kingdom and your righteousness and we pray all this in Jesus name and all God’s people said amen so thank you so much graduates you can go ahead and take a seat want to just let you know really quickly to in order to honor grad graduates today we have down and Cafe a cake we’re hoping that you’ll go down there they’ll be the

the you know always have donuts and whatnot but we have a cake to honor our grads we hope you can go down there if you have cards there’ll be a place to place cards for them as well but one other thing is without we wouldn’t have grads without dads and so we also the cake is for you too dads and we just want to encourage you to go down there get some cake and also dads as you leave today there will be a beef jerky stick

with your name on it so that’s coming your way too all right okay enjoy the rest of the service on you Pastor Steve well given given some of my priorities these days is there a plant-based version of a beef stick I don’t know I don’t know hey good morning church good morning what a what a cool thing I they’re already getting away from us but I was going to make a comment about two Sundays ago in this place we celebrated my father’s turn for home and

he’s face to face with Jesus and I actually quoted those same words from second Timothy chapter four and it struck me as Michael was talking and then praying for them that in fact they apply broadly it was Paul speaking about himself and you know what he was about to head for home like my dad did but it also applies to people younger and at various other sort of transition times significant where there’s a path to follow and they don’t follow it perfectly none of us do

but it is a really cool statement in the Finish verse 8 Second Timothy 4 says Paul was looking for Lord of this crown and then he added comma and there’s a crown for all of us who walk Faithfully with Jesus and someday turn for home to be Faith face to face with him amen I mean that I hope pulls you out of your chair right now because you’re in a you’re on a journey you are following a path you actually I’m referring to not just folks

in the house and we have a great Gathering today I think Krista you said it well there’s some legit men in this church and yeah they’re for real people and they love Jesus and I’m not just talking about my dad I’m seeing a bunch of studs in this room who really do care about Jesus and from there it filters through them to their people their wives and their kids and this church so it’s really special to be up here today and for personal reasons I’ve spent

extra time recently remembering my childhood and reflecting on the many pieces that make up the way that I was parented I guess I’ve done that every Father’s Day Some of Father’s Day has now been hijacked by me and my kids make a big deal about me and Debbie does too but you know I can’t help but look back I had a dad and as I said he’s home with Jesus now but I when I lost my mother a little over two years ago and then lost

my dad just a little less than two months ago both events Unleashed for me a flood of memories I want to stop myself and just tell you I just returned from the Dominican Republic and it was not a pleasure trip it was though it was fun in some respects in many respects it was I’m a member of the board of directors for Missions door I tell you that not to Pat me on the back I tell you that because you all as part of Gracepoint are

connected to two organizations that are mission agencies that are very respected in the world today one of them’s missions door the one that I’m on the direct Board of Directors for the other is World Venture and combined together they have a far reach the reason we went to the Dominican Republic is worth telling you because you you’ll you’ll be proud we we were at a resort but the reason we went there and didn’t bring all our missionaries home to meet in Denver which is where the

headquarters is is for a very practical and honorable reason I I was blown away I actually thought man this I’m going to tell my people when I get home you know what it was the the decision was made because most of our a huge percentage of our missionaries are in poor countries trying to reach very impoverished people with the gospel and they themselves almost to a person is short of support they just are living on a shoestring budget I’m about to pass a plate right now

but I hope this will move in your purse or your wallet to say wow including Patrick O’Connor who used to be part of that mission is now just you can’t nail him to the floor he’s everywhere and he kind of took that thing go into all nations seriously and that’s that’s Patrick but here’s the deal these these people would never be able to come to America they don’t have passports most of them don’t have Visa capabilities anywhere in North America it’d be super convenient for us

because it it meant that we didn’t have to go to the hottest place on planet Earth I’ve ever been to the Dominican Republic it was it was but you know what we did it and we went down there and we loved on those people and I told everybody I met I’m a pastor in Portland Oregon and I want you to know we’re we’re big we’re high on you people and I had to explain that because they’ve heard about Portland lately but anyway no I really did

I wanted you to know there’s there’s words being heard that we care and it’s really cool and once again Victor almaderis he and virgilia were very substantially supported are by our church and they introduced me to their adult daughter who’s now married and is asking if she can come here in the next few months and present her missionary Ministry and seek support from us by the way if you don’t know Victor or anything like that here’s what you do need to know every single time I’ve

talked to him for a lot of years he was met he met the Lord through Patrick O’Connor one that we all know about and I’ll say how’s the mission going how’s it going here in Texas galpa and Santa Rosa and seguato peke and places like that how what’s going on here almost every time there’s an apology it goes Pastor Steve we’re we’re we we hope to raise to to begin 30 churches this year but we only made it to 25. I am so relieved he’s never

asked me how many we’ve planted so don’t report me to him because I don’t have a good answer it’s it’s kind of lame but anyway I just want you to know that’s the kind of stuff that’s happening in Far Away places and to the glory of God so I want to with this being Father’s Day and the first Father’s Day that I don’t have my dad I I was tempted really in my message today to just tell you stories and call it good and you’re beautiful

people and you would indulge me but you wanted something deeper than that I know and I appreciate that so I want to tell you a couple of quick stories that are true like my dad there was a man somewhere along the way that picked on me I was a child probably a middle schooler and he treated me poorly it wasn’t abuse or any of that kind of stuff it wasn’t Criminal but he was kind of rough on me and I’m not all together sure why but

my dad called him and said some things controlled Holy Spirit things but said back off Jack you you do not have permission to say those things to my son and I I happened to hear he was in another room he didn’t want to do it in front of me but I’m sitting there going dad right on give it to him punch him dad punch him you know because the middle schoolers haven’t been fully controlled by the holy spirit yet so but when here’s another one when

that I’ll never forget when my dad came to with an invitation to a meeting with the dean of students in my high school again I I discovered something to my horror the meeting was attended not by my latest altercation with a teacher but by all of my teachers and they proceeded to tell him how I’m doing in their class and I think every one of them used the word disruptive okay and my dad’s taking all this in and then he interrupted and asked the dean how

come this is the first time I’ve heard about this and and the dean’s answer got the response I did not expect the dean says actually we’ve been sending home letters with Steve are you on her side or or what what’s going on here so so I paused because I’m just kind of processing the I feared for my life at that moment I I thought this could go bad and then my dad said with a finger pointed who sends self-incriminating notes home with the child that’s disruptive

as you keep saying and expects those notes to get home love you Dad so much I’m just there going dad yeah that’s a and my look went from as the news came out that I had not somehow they I lost them on the way but but as my dad took the mic so to speak and said who does that and and he wasn’t done he takes out a business card in those days slides it across to the dean he says here’s my business card call me

the next time something like this happens and I’m thinking baby dad you were you’re a stud this is so good you’re shining today and then he turned and pointed a finger at me and said and I will deal with you at home Steve that moment felt to me very much like what we read in our Bibles the fear of the Lord had fallen on me and and it fell fast how many of you have ever show me your hand prayed panicked prayers I did I remember

my prayers Lord please please I don’t ask for much but send a very big earthquake today or I got one better Jesus would you come back today and I’m pretty sure Dad will forget all about this and as I said I’ve got lots of I seriously have a file that’s huge with stories like that and if you if you were told them when my dad was alive you would have said how did you how did you live with him I mean how did you survive I

was that kid and I tell you that not proud of it I tell you this God turned the corner in my life right and I tell you that for some of you and I know your stories you got a child that’s off the rails and it hurts and we’re having fun with it right now but it hasn’t been fun for you for a long time I mentioned my mother because I have her on my mind as well she she was a rock star in my mind

she was that Mom that really worked Miracles she was absolutely my most unconditional fan and you want that you want a parent in the corner with you not that they’ll look the other way when you’re messing up but that they’re not going to kick you to the curb either and my mother was that person one quick story she got my my job back for me when I got fired not once but twice same place I was a it was a service station Jim freeway shell on

Market Street in Salem my brother and I both worked there for five years and we had two it was not a gas station it was a service station two stalls that we fixed cars in and the third stall was a car wash and part of our job as you know just grunts it was to make sure that the car wash soap was full in the mixer they called it and you had to do that and there’s a very extraordinary soap made by the Zep company and

I still remember and it was bright blue it was beautiful blue and but it was so th it was thicker than pouring honey north of the Arctic in barrows Alaska in the dead of winter you’ll just stand there forever and try so we would take this it’s a huge Barrel 55 gallon barrel and it laid on its side on top of another barrel and there’s a spigot we’ve got things to do out there pumping gas and things like that so we would take a jug of

one gallon jug and aim well and make sure that it was gonna eventually fill that jug and it did and we both forgot all about it sometime later we came whipping around the corner there’s air filters I had to grab one and we for a car and I come around the corner and just about crashed on my head looking at a sea of blue and a jug that had been filled to capacity easily an hour earlier and I’m take it in with me would you it’s

like a thousand to one ratio soap to water so I’m thinking I gotta clean this up Glenn we got to get this out of here quick get a hose yep yep zip Suds that could be seen from space just unbelievable just I I don’t know I thought this is the way to do we got a high-powered hose let’s just do what is happening here and it didn’t occur to me before you could hardly see the gas station with all these we were busted and we both

got fired and my mother was the greatest I was dead to rights I mean I but the greatest defense attorney and somehow we got our job back so I’m gonna say I had good parents both my mom and my dad and I want you to know why I bring my mom up on Father’s Day because we were in Australia and missed Mother’s Day before I left Fullerton Swindoll gave me this Council don’t blow it on Mother’s Day and I remember living in fear of most of

you moms for a long time and one of the ways you could blow it is not to speak on Mother’s Day that’s kind of a miss and I thought you know I don’t know how I’m going to honor moms and then it occurred to me I have a chance to do that today moms actually dads and moms and that’s what I’m going to do for the next 20 minutes okay and and my I I’m I’m excited because I’m combining something that actually the Bible combines you’re

going to like this you really you really are my Mother’s Day message with my Father’s Day message and you’ve seen the series title and leave the results of God so allow me a couple of flexibilities and you’ll see why it’s an appropriate request on my part when we get to the text allow me to thought that we can take father and mother and replace it with parents okay how many okay with that all right good because that’s what they are they’re parents and in light of

our summer series that I’ve titled leave the result and leave the results to God today is parenting that leaves the results to God would you please write down a resource that you or somebody you know needs I promise you and I don’t care if your kids are adult all the way adult like older adults you need this it’s called losing control and liking it and Manifesto for Christian parenting losing control and liking it by Tim suffered but I’m sorry it was a Stafford’s look it up

is it on there okay I’m sorry I I actually prepared this sermon before I was gone last week so great you’ve got the title get one I bought boxes we’ve spent a lot of church money giving out this book because it’s huge okay if you’re a parent of little people it’s huge if you’re a parent of teenager Huger if it’s an adult hugest okay so get it and I don’t think you’ll regret it so there’s a reason maybe many reasons for separate days to honor moms

and dads one little person offered an explanation when asked why the difference and or what’s the difference and he said it’s just like Father’s Day is just like Mother’s Day only you don’t spend as much it’s kind of fun give us a stake and we’re fine right so the Bible combines moms and dads to in its Council to be good parents so I’m turning to Ephesians in the New Testament and I’d like you to turn there as well this morning and let’s call it parents you’ll

see why now when we open the text stop off on your way to chapter six I want you to stop off for just a second because I want to tell you about the Apostle Paul who actually started this church the Holy Spirit started it through him on his second missionary journey that we’ve talked about already in Acts and then his third Journey which was a year later he actually stopped and unpacked his bags for three years and while there in his fourth in this this third

Journey he built a lot of Rich truth into the brand new Believers in Ephesus it’s a place in the Aegean Sea you can go there look it on a map and you’ll see what I’m talking about but the Apostle Paul was explaining in this letter six chapter letter will be in chapter six in a sec he’s explaining the implications of the Gospel in chapter four The reason I had you stop there because I want you to I’m sorry I said chapter four it’s verse 4 of

chapter two look across the page but because of his great love for us God who is rich in Mercy made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions It Is by grace that you have been saved so Paul is explaining how God In Love Don’t Miss verse four or you miss why did God do this what would make him send his son for people like the high school kid I described a little bit ago it’s because he loves us so in love he

He sent Jesus to save and here’s the deal not good people that’s why he says in verse 5 he’s he saved dead people well it’s popular to say yeah my child’s a little off the path no your child’s worse than you think a hundred percent of every one of our children were born depraved that means with sin and they were born that way and they got really good at that some kept it quiet they didn’t show their true colors and we were faked out we thought

oh man they are just that sinless person the closest to that I’ve ever come is my wife Debbie and I have told you I’ve had to teach her how to sin so it’s just a problem here right so here’s the deal what I’m saying is he loved us so much that He sent Jesus to in grace and grace basically is a a favorite word in the gospel it’s in our name why because it’s God doing something you didn’t deserve there will be no transaction in heaven

not one check will be torn from a checkbook and handed to Jesus When we arrive in heaven not one you would never think of it because you you need more than money can buy you’re spiritually dead and you need life so he saved us and then the rest of the book really chapters three four five and six are all about implications of him changing our lives and my favorite places to have you flip the page and look at chapter five and look at verse 8 you

were once Darkness but now you are light in the Lord not some of you all of you all of us so live as children of light hopefully you’re asking the question what’s that look like he tells us the fruit of light consists of stuff like goodness righteousness and Truth and my favorite seven words in this whole passage come up next verse 10 and find out what pleases the Lord he repeats it in second Corinthians chapter 5 verse 9. Find out what makes God smile he he

gave you a gift of Grace salvation when you were dead and now he’s given us Counsel on how to make him smile and then he applies all that I’ve just said to various relationships if you haven’t looked up husbands and wives lately finish chapter 5 and you’ll get a ton of cool stuff this isn’t a message about marriage today it could be but you make it a message if you need some counsel wives about what it looks like to be a wife led by God in

a way that pleases God okay the husbands same way you’re kind of the little loss right now this Father’s Day you don’t deserve it whatever that’s the place to go and then if you jump down to verse 5 in chapter six so we’re at the last chapter so chapter five chapter five ends with husbands and wives the section we’re going to talk about now parents and kids and then chapter 6 verse 5 talks about something most of us do or have done for a very long

time employers and employees how to be a good employee that makes Jesus smile I’ll tell you something the standards higher than some of our workplaces just putting up with mediocrity all that all day long now take your game up stand out not because you’re trying to get a raise but because you’re trying to get this raise from Jesus he looks at you and says baby you’re nailing it you’re you’re the employee I wanted you to be and bosses there’s Council there too so if you need

some sort of a prompting on how to be a good boss you’re kind of disgusted by the choices you have today take it to the Bible God will give you great counsel this is all in verses five to nine so our topic today children and their parents look on with me and let’s read these five verses children obey your parents in the Lord begins verse six or chapter six for this is right honor your father and mother which is the first commandment with a promise so

that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the Earth verse 4. Fathers do not exasperate your children instead bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord and then look verse 5 it just picks up on employees and employ slaves and owners okay so Paul begins with counsel here to Children you know why I’m glad for that how many raise your hand if you’re a child not a trick question y’all it took two of them to make

you okay you are their child they may both be gone but you never lose the identity you’re somebody’s kid sorry child you are so I’m glad he begins there and here’s the principle you need to write down children that’s his starting point children verse one choose what is right so there’s something for us to do as children no matter the age you’ll see why I say that in a minute even his counsel here is obey your parents that’s how the verse goes children obey your parents

so that council is good in any time especially when challenging resisting even resenting Authority is commonplace in our world pick it up your boss teacher police parents we don’t just politely dismiss their counsel we go don’t don’t look I’m grown up I don’t need to hear it right some of you are saying oh yeah but there’s limits to that okay there is I’ll share one the limits aren’t extensive at all the council here is everybody that’s a child fits verse 1. Now stay with me Paul

tells Timothy in chapter 4 of second Timothy that’s the last chapter he ever wrote and he’s describing I’m sorry chapter three he’s describing terrible times to come chapter 3 in the first five verses it’s you’ll read it out of the headlines if you pick up your Bible today and read realize this in the last days terrible times will come and then Paul inspired by the Holy Spirit lists click 19 attributes of the last days here’s your challenge read that today and you tell me that’s not

the world we live in today okay but in chapter in verse 2 he’s got second Timothy 3 1-5 and verse two guess what Finds Its way into that list of terrible things disobedient to parents you don’t have to take their input a lot of countries say parents have zero rights somehow you because you’re a parent you don’t know what you’re doing I would argue just the opposite anyway and we’re told here in the same passage just look on verse two we’re told because according to God

it’s the right thing to do so obey your parents in the Lord for this is right and I want to warn you don’t get stuck on the phrase in verse 1. In the Lord people have and they typically get stuck on it until they dismiss or eliminate it from the discussion well Steve if you knew my parents they’re not of the Lord let me give you two quick transl interpretations of this one is in the Lord has been translated obey your parents actually obey your parents

because you belong to the Lord it’s allowed in this setting or a second interpretation of it obey your parents who belong to the Lord now you’re getting really close to the exemption in your mind if you’re thinking yep there it is I’ve got an exception I don’t have good parents Steve I’m not arguing that but listen to this obey your parents who belong to the Lord is a limiter obey your parents period is inclusive hold on some people have said this only applies Steve don’t you

realize to young children remember age of accountability if I had time I would say here’s my Bible you tell me a single verse where that’s taught in God’s word it is not age of accountability I’ve been in so many conversations with people that say hey man I’m past the age of accountability I am not going to obey my parents it is not a Biblical concept people it isn’t we need to adjust our thinking talk to me afterwards and we’ll have a great conversation but most agree

that the command here children obey your parents and the Lord for this is right is not only sound but serious counsel as to be followed provided parents are not contrary to God you say well that’s an exception it is it’s the only one I know in the Bible and it has nothing to do with age of accountability it has to do if your parents are giving you bogus counsel that’s not supported in the Bible like Acts chapter 4 and 5 twice there the apostles are brought

it brought in they’re told to shut up quit telling people about Jesus you’re upsetting the place Jerusalem is a mess because of you so back down they were told remember Peter and and the apostles response hey you guys get to choose what you’re going to do to us but we cannot we’re going to make a decision here we’re not going to obey you that’s a governor that’s an authority a religious Authority we’re going to obey God Acts chapter 4 verse 9 and chapter or 19 and

chapter 5 verse 29 says the same exact thing okay so from simple obedience which is what that verse is saying or compliance children are called to take their game up to a higher and more far-reaching requirement that you absolutely never outgrow and that’s in verses two and three honor your parents to reverently respect and venerate your parents I know that’s hard for some that doesn’t mean we get a pass on this it’s really quiet in here which tells me this is striking a chord and I

understand that I I can I welcome our follow-up conversation because I’m not putting you under somebody’s judgment or control or abuse not saying that the Bible is giving us permanent counsel here to honor your father and mother and it gives the strength of this Council as a command it’s a requirement and it comes with a reward all right you with me so look back at it honor your father and mother first commandment with a promise it’s not the first commandment of the ten it’s the first

one with a promise in it okay so we’re to honor our father and mother and notice we’re told in verse 3 two reasons why so it will go well with and for you stay with me okay don’t don’t get distracted by anything the quality of your life is we’re being told here will be enhanced if your purpose is to honor your parents and as we honor our parents things like the outflowing of God’s favor results in our lives you say well they they don’t deserve it

I again I I understand that I I do that’s not my story but I’ve talked to people that that is their story so there’s nothing here to put you in under bondage there’s here to say hopefully I’m saying it well enough that you’re going I’m inspired I got to figure out how I can honor my parents because I can I say I want the flow of God’s blessing in my life and through my life everybody okay on that one so that’s the it’ll go well with

you notice secondly in verse 3 and you will live long and prosper and it’s not Star Trek okay it’s not that all right it’s something way deeper than that in fact it’s an actual Priestly prayer that we fell in love with a song during the pandemic Numbers chapter six the Lord bless you and keep you we used to just sing that and our souls were bathed in its truth make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you the Lord turn his face towards you

and give you what and give peace we could go places on this one it’s a beautiful song so before we’re finished okay that’s the promise you’ll it’ll go well with you and you will live a long life I want us to flip the focus for the finish here to fathers and their great influence and impact on our lives sometimes for good I’ve said that sometimes for bad for even evil by the way the context I’ve told you this and it here’s the reveal okay the context

here allows for including mothers in the council that begins in verse four begins and ends in verse four in fact I’ve got my Bible open to to The New International Version the NIV and if you’ll look at yours you too have a letter next to fathers that begins verse 4. Mine’s the letter d and it takes you to a footnote at the bottom of the page and what’s the footnote say parents a lot of translations make that adjustment it’s not a reach it’s not saying hey

this only applies and couldn’t possibly be needed counsel for moms and that’s rubbish theology I know I could tell stories I would never tell them but I can tell you stories of dads and moms that exasperated their children I stood at a place I couldn’t believe my ears I had to look over because this mother recently was dressing down her I’ll say two-year-old child With cursing and it had nothing to do with love it it was it was a rip it was like wow we’re given

that child identity words in a very young age what’s the chances how’s that child on her mom and dad okay now you’re set in a single verse two pieces of wise counsel meet verse 4 let me read it again parents do not exasperate your children instead bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord the Salman say it okay you could write this down this council is practice imperfect parenting okay that’s how that’s how it starts that leaves the results to God that’s the

resolve of some pain in lots of parents Hearts you go man I wish I could play it back so do I there’s I’m not perfect there are moments I’m thinking I would take those words back I would like to undo what I did anybody feel that way just me of course you do because you’re imperfect just like me so we’ve got that in common so by the way James Dobson anybody read Dobson yeah wonderful right anywhere anybody read parenting isn’t for cowards yeah we have okay

and because we were getting scared not a child in particular we were just in over our heads there’s only two of us and three of them and I was do the math you know so so I remember the opening of this book and he talks about a couple who doesn’t matter who they are but they were perfect parents they were amazing parents so amazing that their story got out and people started to ask for them to come and speak like on a Father’s Day they might

be invited to come and speak on your amazing wisdom and success what’s your story and and they did it I don’t know I’m not going to impugn them maybe it got to their head maybe they didn’t maybe they were humbled by it but they they were on the circuit okay and they did it for a while and it was all good and people just meant when they’re done they’re like would you sign this book you’re amazing man you’ve got it going and then the lord gave

them a fourth child let’s call him Steve Dobson called him a little tornado and guess what happened they stopped taking speaking assignments because they did it well for three and they could not find a way to do it well on the little tornado why do we get sick humor and pleasure out of that because we all don’t name your tornado out loud right now I don’t need that we’ll just go with Steve Okay so so what are we told here well first of all negatively don’t

provoke your people don’t provoke that’s what exasperate means you say what’s provoking it’s needling them it’s writing your kid it’s it’s the helicopter parent run out of gas on that one would you I’m not saying let them go to the dark side but I’m saying that you’re helping them want to go there because because it’s too much and I know some parents that are just man my child is a teenager they’ve never had sugar laughs I haven’t even had coffee obviously that’s not true with me

okay so just enough do you get what I mean it’s like quit writing them when we do that we risk taking the wind out of their sails how many children have to tell me somewhere along the way I can’t do it I cannot live up to their crazy expectations it leaves them feeling like they they can’t be good enough keep in mind this is a clear potential parents have or folks look at verse 4 again it would not be in your Bible or mine waste words

in the Bible and say hey don’t provoke your kids unless it’s a real potential not just in dads but in moms I do it more than Debbie but for the record but you get what I mean so and there are lots of ways we do it here’s a quick list frequent blaming you know some parents are just like blaming their child for global warming I mean really it’s like give them a break you here’s one do you just seldom praising them like I saw that mother

do sarcasm and ridicule the child complied she was too and I just thought man why do I have the urge to slap you and say I’m not sorry that’s my dark side you you do me here’s one inconsistency partiality as a parent you know so you you know a parent that does that you got a fave guess what your people know you’ve got a fave or basing your treatment on your people’s performance only this is really special stuff when our child performs well sometimes it’s irresistible

to Want To Praise them and I get that but when they don’t perform well we can do just the opposite and be harsh or just Island a warning be careful parents you’re loaded with octane you have power humongous power I have more power than I’m comfortable with as a parent so know your power I told you about my brother and I my sister I don’t think she ever sinned so but my brother and I made up for her and and but we were very different people

and I could see my brother like doing something that he’s going to get corrected for and my dad would say or my mother would say Glenn see this face watch my face now Glenn you know what Glenn did what and it was over he stepped away from the power socket or something I don’t know and then and then my parents would see me about to do something wrong and they’d go Steve and I’d go what I’m like I’m not making this stuff up my dad’s gone

so he can’t verify it but it’s true and here’s the deal they gave me the same look that they gave Glenn and it didn’t work at all and I actually which explains why I usually got more than the look just saying okay so don’t exasperate your children parents it makes them want to give up along the way throw up it’s not cool instead here’s the positive and I love the Bible it gives us good look how verse 4 ends instead he says that means don’t beat

them up instead Praise Him build them up bring them up two ways in the training and instruction of the Lord takes careful nurture daily nurture to mature our kids and I’m going to bring a word in that I haven’t said all morning and grandkids you are a huge player in all this grandparents two ways are noted training that’s the focus of Correction that’s the word there bring them up in the training the word is correction it’s idea it’s a it’s a hey straighten out straighten up

stop doing that and by the way it’s the same word that’s used in Hebrews 12 which we all know about which talks about God’s discipline and no one likes it when God does that right so he backs off and says man I don’t want to upset you no he says I want to correct you and he even tells us why because I love you so much I would stand in front of a train for you or take a bullet for you I don’t care what it

is that’s what God’s saying and so we need to train our kids in a similar way but don’t go too far correct them but parenting does not require you to use a cannon to kill a mosquito just doesn’t so don’t go don’t go too far again realize your power and then finally instructions you see that verse ends and instruction of the Lord this is verbal instruction and warning but where you talk with them rather than talk to them you know the difference it’s weird because I’m

up here right now and I’m talking to you but I hope you’re going to leave here and go man I could breathe I didn’t feel like he was beating me up and if if you don’t feel that way don’t tell me I’m trying okay I mean I really don’t want to beat you up any more than I would want to be beat up if I’m struggling with how things have gone more time I think discussing and less demanding nothing you know you use words that are

unconditional words like you know something you could have you said to your child nothing you could succeed at would make me love you more you said that unless they won the lottery and then they shared the loot with you you might say that one but the flip side nothing you fail at I want you to know will cause me to feel any less love for you thank good Ness great godly instruction for parenting carried out by us imperfect people human to the core human parents who

want to parent well but I’ll just can be the first to confess have fallen short maybe not constantly but enough to remind you man I’m in over my head I need help and you know what the holy spirit’s

Transcript machine-generated from the sermon audio, so it may contain errors. 7,870 words.